How to love without saying “I love you”

It was the Valentine’s day. Roses and chocolates galore. I  was in a mall full of lovebirds and I wondered, “what is love on a normal day?

Then I got a text from my mom and she inspired me. I made this list.

1) For more than 20 years, my mom never missed a day waking up at 5.30 am to ready my sisters and I for school. She said,“I hardly go to school, so I am not as smart as other’s mom. But I do my best.”

2) My mom never allowed pet at home. One day, she changed her mind. My sister is an animal lover and she just broke up. My mom allowed my sister to keep the stray dog she had been pleading for my mom’s permission  Now, Brownie is my mom’s fourth daughter. My mom mixes Omega 3 fish oil along with chicken breast and fine cut cabbage for Brownie as lunch.

3) My mom started taking snapshots of Brownie because she knows I love seeing Her. She sends the pictures to me via WhatsApp every day. She keeps me closer to home.

4) My mom texts me every day to remind me to drink water, to have dinner on time, and not to leave office too late. Sometimes, I lie about my late dinner to give her a peace of mind.

5) My mom feeds the stray kittens at the back alley of my house every day. One day, she murmured to the kittens, “I hope you help me to collect karma merit, OK? I just want everyone in the family to be safe and healthy”.

6) My parents used to stay awake until everyone came home. So, I rarely clubbed during my teen and I never understood why the drama of curfew. I do now. I still hardly club and I am fine by it.

7) I return to KL and leave for Bangkok routinely. Despite after many years, my mom still tears every time she sends me off. Evelyn, a friend in a long distance relationship said, “You can never get used to goodbye. Goodbye sucks”. .

8) My dad calls my mom from between his work breaks, several times a day, The calls are usually short and they talk about all nitty gritty. Now, my mom knows exactly when the phone will ring and when it does, she will say, “it is your dad, again” with a smile. Romance at its plainest dress.

9) My parents never took vacations before I moved to Bangkok; now they started to frequent The land of Smiles. Every time, they refuse to visit other places but my messy little studio. Obviously, mom thinks no one cleans the house better than her. It is true.

10) My grandpa did not say a word when my grandma passed away. He sat still in his room and stared into empty space for a very very long time. Some memories are too sweet but painful to speak out loud, so we resort to silence. Grandpa turned 99 this year. He married grandma when he was 20.

Grandpa reminds me of Fred. He was a 95-year-old Peoria man who lost his wife of nearly 75 years.

Fred wrote a song and it is called “Oh sweet Lorraine” and the song went viral. Lorraine was his wife’s name.

He said: “As much as I’ve enjoyed the success of the song I would give it all up in a heartbeat to get just a few moments more with Lorraine.”

I guess, this is love on a normal day.

You can read about Fred’s story here. 


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